Plan for a baby? – what is the cost? – what about your health?

Babies

Plan for a baby? What is the cost of having a baby?  I do not mean in monetary terms, I mean emotional and physical terms. No matter how old you are it is a very emotional time.

When you are pregnant the hormonal changes, the body image changes and emotional changes are very real and for some people can be very stressful.   I do not mean just for the female who is having the child I also mean the father of the child too.  When you plan for a baby – there is a lot to consider.

There are so many things to consider:

  • Hospital costs
  • Time off workHow much does it cost to have a baby
  • Vitamins
  • Baby Products include everything
  • New clothes for Mom
  • New shoes for Mom (your feet swell up)

When you way up the financial cost of having a baby that in itself is enough to stress anyone.  I am not covering the practical or the financial here

I am not covering the practical or the financial here I am covering the emotional effects of bringing a child or children into the world.

Planned or Not Planned that is the question?

So first things first if this is a pleasant surprise that was planned and you are waiting eagerly to start a family then your stress levels might be slightly less than if you did not expect this news at all.  Therefore for the happy couple who are about to embark on a new chapter of their lives and once they get over the initial excitement might be thinking:-

  • How am I going to be a good parent
  • How am I going to support us all
  • Is our home going to be big enough
  • Will the baby be born okRelief for Panic Attacks
  • What will I do if the baby is not ok
  • What if it is a girl, I really want a boy
  • What if it is a boy, I really want a girl
  • Will my partner still find me attractive
  • Will I have the time to be a partner and parent
  • Will he still want me when I have stretch marks

So it goes on the questions, the doubts, the fears.     Both Mother and Father to be will have these thoughts and a lot more going on in their head about the cost of having a baby.  It does not matter what background you come from you will still have a lot of thoughts and concerns about becoming a parent.

If it is not Planned

If your pregnancy is not planned and you were not expecting your life to take this turn at that moment then there is much more additional stress and anxiety.   All of the above applies but before you even get to that point there are other factors to consider.

  • What will my parents say
  • Shall I keep the baby
  • Will the father be around                                                                                              Planning a baby
  • Can I do this on my own
  • Am I too young for this
  • Am I too old for this
  • We can’t afford another baby
  • Where will we live
  • How will I be able to afford the expense

Many more questions depending on your situation and what age you are and if you are in a relationship or not.  None the less the stress and your emotional state can be overwhelming. Something which may help.

What can you do about it?

One of the best things to lessen the stress is to make a list.   List everything that is on your mind good and bad.

When we make lists then the challenge is looking at us and we can assess easier.

When it is all in our head we go over and over the same things and then add some more things and we go around in circles and become overwhelmed.   Once you make the list you can then look at each entry you have written and put a possible solution or solutions next to it. You do not need to work out the ‘HOW’ just write down the possible solutions or outcomes.

Talk things over with someone you trust and mention your concerns, make sure you are discussing the possible solutions and not all the bad things that might happen.   Bringing another human being into the world should not be taken lightly as it is a big responsibility.  As humans we have been reproducing for centuries, therefore there is nothing you are going through that someone else has not done already.

Make sure you breathe, when we are stressed we tend to breathe faster and shorter. Planning a baby Take deep breaths and release the stress as you exhale.  There are a lot of natural remedies you can take to keep you calm and think more clearly. Of course my personal favorite is Emotional Freedom Techniques, if you do not know about EFT I suggest you learn it will come in very handy for the new baby as well.

Planned or not planned the cost of having a baby on our emotions and body are real and should not be left to fester and become a form of anger or resentment which could be misdirected to people we love or perhaps the child.

Stress is real and it is the cause of most diseases in the world to-day so please check your stress levels on a daily basis and do something to reduce the level.

When you finish reading this please share using the buttons below and also your comments would be greatly appreciated.  I will answer and help in any way I can.

I beHelen Vellacame a writer, speaker and holistic life coach so I could make a difference by teaching from my personal experiences and also teaching a great empowering tool. My mission is to empower everyone to be their true self. if you want to find out more about me click here

 

Some reading you might like…….
Baby Tips                             Dads guide to pregnancy



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24 Comments

  1. Roberta Perrone

    All so very true, it is amazing what goes through your head after that first ultrasound, you see the heartbeat and then what?! As I sit in bed today with my daughter who is now 4 (and home from school) I couldn’t imagine life without her and her brother. Anxiety, stress and postpartum are real… talking and breathing are very important and its OK. Thank You for this great article.

    Reply
    1. helenvella (Post author)

      Thank you for your wonderful comments and so happy to hear you are blessed with 2 wonderful children. You are right stress, anxiety and postpartum are real and talking and breathing are extremely important for coping. There are so many things you have to learn when you have a new baby.

      Reply
  2. sonja

    Great post and very informative! I agree with everything you wrote.

    Reply
    1. helenvella (Post author)

      Glad you agree, having a baby is a big step and should be as stress free as possible for the health of the parents and the unborn child.

      Reply
  3. Emma

    When I was due with my daughter is thought I knew everything but there was so much I wasn’t ready for. This resulted in PND. The only thing I have realised is you can’t plan anything when it comes to childbirth or being a parent.

    Reply
    1. helenvella (Post author)

      Totally there is so much to know and every baby and parent is different. You have to know yourself and your baby and do what is best for the both of you and take everyone’s suggestions and pick and choose what you pick.

      Reply
  4. Peter

    I love the dummies guides, that’s why I named my website that title. Great lists you have provided to your readers. Very well done.
    Cheers, Peter

    Reply
    1. helenvella (Post author)

      Yes great name for your site. Thanks for the comments.

      Reply
  5. Axton

    Having a baby can cause serious stress to a parent, which may lead to depression. We have read about new parents committed suicide, newborn babies being abandoned etc. When depression is detected, one should take quick actions to handle it.

    Reply
    1. Helen Vella (Post author)

      Not always easy to do but as soon as depression is detected action should be taken but sometimes the person does not realize they are depressed and they do not seek help.

      Reply
  6. Matt

    Having a baby is definitely a huge huge commitment – One you should be prepared for. Such a life changing event should be taken as no joke. I think these are really solid tips and many parents neglect to think about the stress a baby brings into ones life.

    Reply
    1. Helen Vella (Post author)

      Great points, the emotional stress having babies and what is expected of you as parents can be overwhelming.

      Reply
  7. Timothy Gagnon

    Yea, that’s one of the reasons I never wanted to have a kid. Very informative article though! Thanks for taking the time to write it. Both my brothers had babies when they were my age!

    Reply
    1. Helen Vella (Post author)

      thanks for your comments glad you found it informative.

      Reply
  8. Aaliyah

    This is a nice website that you’ve put together. Pregnancy is a great topic that you’ve covered and I know that many women out there need this kind of advice. My sister is pregnant with her first child and sometimes she has her concerns and worries. I will definitely recommend her to check out your article.

    Reply
    1. Helen Vella (Post author)

      Thank you for your feedack. Thank you for referring your sister also. Stress during pregnancy is very real and should be taken seriously.

      Reply
  9. James W D

    My wife and I have had three kids, 2 unexpected boys and 1 girl we planned (with her coming in the middle).

    I can certainly say that you are never truly prepared for what comes with a child, but the more you prep the easier it is.

    My best advice is to talk to other parents, especially those with young children as their experience is more up to date. Find out what surprises they had and that will help you prepare yourself.

    Reply
    1. Helen

      Great advice James thanks for sharing

      Reply
  10. Jsackmom

    I had so many worries with my pregnancies and I wrote out lists for everything. It helped me organize my thoughts and start preparing for these little babies to change my life in a multitude of ways. I’m glad I did that I appreciated reading your lists too. It was a great reminder that I have something special to share with my kids before I became their Mom. ?

    Reply
    1. Helen Vella (Post author)

      Thank you appreciate the comments being aware and less stressed is part way to releasing anxiety before it turns into panic.

      Reply
  11. David

    Exactly as you said I believe that having a baby on the way will always produce some sort of stress to both potential parents. Even if the baby is planned. Thanks you for writing down your experience how to deal with it.

    Reply
    1. Helen Vella (Post author)

      Thanks for the comments,I hope it will help.

      Reply
  12. Maurice Jackson

    This article really peaked my interest, considering that I had just researched the topic. And I found this content to be very enlightening.

    Reply
    1. Helen Vella (Post author)

      Thank you Maurice….

      Reply

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